01. WHAT TIME DID YOU GET UP THIS MORNING? 6:30am, to go to my dentist's appt. at 8 am
02. DIAMONDS OR PEARLS? I don't do precious stones. But if I did, I would smuggle diamonds in with all the amethyst. Aren't pearls just oyster spit? Yeah, see, and "Oyster Spit" would be a good band name.
03. WHAT IS THE LAST FILM THAT YOU SAW AT The CINEMA? As a student of Kevin Smith movies, it was my honor and obligation to be at the Mallrats theater to see "Clerks II" in 2006. I was neither sober, nor quiet, as I screamed loudly from the center of the 2nd row in a way that would have made Jay and Silent Bob proud.
04. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE TV SHOW? Currently? PTI. Until "Rescue Me" comes back. Networks will find a way to screw it up, but I really enjoy The Sarah Connor Chronicles, too.
05. WHAT DO YOU USUALLY HAVE FOR BREAKFAST? A banana, or an apple at home; then a Clif bar on the drive to work.
06. WHAT IS YOUR MIDDLE NAME? C
07. WHAT FOOD DO YOU DISLIKE? Processed junk from tv commercials, fast food, kid-friendly shit, etc.
08. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CD? Both Angels & Airwaves CD's get played everyday; this is what my February 2008 has been like.
09. WHAT KIND OF CAR DO YOU DRIVE? A 19 yr. old silver 5-door dinosaur with a stock AC Delco AM/FM cassette deck.
10. FAVORITE SANDWICH? My current lunch; a spicy black bean burger (or veggie pizza burger), lettuce, tomato, red onion, pepperjack cheese, and Asian mustard, on Static Girl bread. Add a serrano pepper on the side, a bottle of XXX Vitamin Water, nuts, and you've got a pretty damn awesome foundation right there.
11. WHAT CHARACTERISTIC DO YOU DESPISE? Closed-minded, elitist, selfish, self-absorbed, me me me, prima donna, entitled women who honestly believe that they are so very important. Women like this are the reason inflatable love dolls exist.
12. FAVORITE ITEM OF CLOTHING? Is it still my green 1996 Fig Dish t-shirt? Apparently.
13. IF YOU COULD GO ANYWHERE IN THE WORLD ON VACATION, WHERE WOULD YOU GO? Both Carolinas, a week back in Athens, GA, and another week in Savannah to party with Captain Beach Bum. You ask where I would go; but don't you really want to know who I would take with me, what a typical day of this vacation would be like, and what I hope to accomplish? See; 'coz some lazy fool is just going to answer this with "Hawaii". Woo; how exciting.
14. WHAT COLOR IS YOUR BATHROOM? I cleaned it yesterday, so it's kinda...pale white, like me.
15. FAVORITE BRAND OF CLOTHING? Denim and cotton; find me some hemp, too. Wait. What are we talking about?
16. WHERE WOULD YOU RETIRE TO? Right now; Canada. Or North Carolina. Did you notice that was a vacation spot, too?
17. WHAT WAS YOUR MOST MEMORABLE BIRTHDAY? I turned 18; a bunch of us consumed party supplies and stayed up all night, culminating in an 8 am football game where we trashed the field of our old high school. Good times. #2 would be my last birthday; I spent 7 hours partying high speed at the Blues Jam of my favorite bar right here.
18. FAVORITE SPORT TO WATCH? Hockey has the most action.
19. FARTHEST PLACE YOU ARE SENDING THIS? I have to send this?
20. WHO DO YOU LEAST EXPECT TO SEND THIS BACK TO YOU? Nobody sends these fuckers back to me.
21. PERSON YOU EXPECT TO SEND IT BACK FIRST? What did I just say?
22. FAVORITE SAYING? "If you say so."
23. WHEN IS YOUR BIRTHDAY? My birthday week is the first 10 days of August.
24. ARE YOU A MORNING OR NIGHT PERSON? I would SO rather go back to working nights.
25. WHAT IS YOUR SHOE SIZE? 11, usually.
26. PETS? We adopted 2 great guinea pigs in January.
27. ANY NEW AND EXCITING NEWS THAT YOU WOULD LIKE TO SHARE WITH US? I was writing in February! I NEVER write in February. Then I got sick, and now I'm really tired. And now I've got all this new noise in my head. The playground is exciting. Chase and taste.
28. WHAT DID YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU WERE LITTLE? Invisible. Anything but human. Hey; you fucking asked.
29. HOW OLD ARE YOU TODAY? In the homestretch of the 25-45 age range.
30. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CANDY? I like the Symphony bars with almonds and toffee. But for now I really want to lick some red hots across the buns and out the crack of some fine girl's ass. And between her boobs, too. Oh hell; I also want to lick from her inside heel all the way up to the inner thigh bristles, until her whole body quivers. Wait; what were we talking about? Favorite candy: whatever she wants me to lick off of her. She might even like the red hots idea. That was a pretty good spontaneous crotch blurt.
31. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE FLOWER? Hemp; that was fucking easy. You know I'm in Oregon, right?
32. WHAT IS A DAY ON THE CALENDAR YOU ARE LOOKING FORWARD TO? Enough with the measuring of moments already! Saturday, Sunday, and whatever the next day I lay the fuck out of work is. Monday, apparently.
33. WHAT IS YOUR FULL NAME? W C D, bitch
34. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW? A & A; "I-Empire", and the Cure "Mixed Up".
35. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE? My home-made burritos; a garlic rice pot wrapped in jalapeno/cheddar tortillas.
36. DO YOU WISH ON STARS? Sure; wtf else can you do with stars?
37. IF YOU WERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE? The best answer I ever gave was "midnight blue"; the explanation was so good that I scared myself. You ask about colors, and all I can think of are pretty panties. Pink, red and black are sweet, yes, but not really good for crayons. Pink Panty Pulldown; I guess pink is my color for this exercise.
39. FAVORITE SOFT DRINK? Still Code Red Mountain Dew; I think this is about a 6-year run now. Nothing else comes close.
40. FAVORITE RESTAURANT? I haven't been out to eat in months. But we love the Ring of Fire. They have excellent vegan food, they recycle everything, and it's a local landmark.
41. Hello? McFly? I have no fucking 41 here. Am I supposed to make some shit up, or just move on?
42. FAVORITE DAY OF THE YEAR? Again with the moment-measuring! Surveys should give you a choice of 5 calender days; ask which one you like best, and why. Nobody fucking listens to me.
43. WHAT WAS YOUR FAVORITE TOY AS A CHILD? The answer is Legos, followed by giant tinkertoys and Lincoln Logs. The Vertibird, and slot cars would also have their time. What I liked, appreciated, and excelled at was: having a "new", temporary pile of incomplete art, on the floor, in front of me. Now we're going to take this pile and create something from it. And I would. The analogy doesn't fit perfectly to playing a game of pinball now, but close.
44. SUMMER OR WINTER? I'd rather sweat than shiver--but wtf do I know? In the Winter you can snuggle under a blanket with a friend. Red hots; mmmmm.
45. HUGS OR KISSES? Yes, and more of both. Not to complain though; the lack of superficial affection I get from home creates some of the best artistic passion; the NEED to create and deliver. Sometimes I forget how lucky I am. I've been writing in February, for fuck's sake.
46. COFFEE OR TEA? I'm a java junkie, bitch. But I can drink tea; I like green tea. I used to brew my own cold, sweet green tea. Why did I quit?
47. CHOCOLATE OR VANILLA? Any idiot can say chocolate. So; since chocolate has it's customer base lined up around the block, with a 2-hour wait; I'll take a big pile of yummy, familiar vanilla, and lick it all up and down her frame like we did with the red hots. She'll love it. I also want to stick my dick through a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup, and watch her lip it off. Huh? What were we talking about? Hmm; you innocently ask about chocolate or vanilla, and I'm over here sticking my dick in candy. Welcome to MY world.
48. DO YOU WANT YOUR FRIENDS TO EMAIL YOU BACK? Mine wouldn't waste their time with this shit.
49. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED? Ooo, last week when I was sick. I had one really bad night.
50. WHAT IS UNDER YOUR BED? My Buddy Box, baseball cards, and some shoe boxes full of shit that will probably get thrown away when I dig them out again.
51. WHAT FRIEND HAVE YOU HAD THE LONGEST? TPG I guess. I've known him since 1990, and, well, we had a little strain back in 2003-04, then I left Phoenix in 2005. I guess we're okay now--I don't know. I've known my girlfriend for 10 years, and my FCP for 15. Can girls be best friends? Whoa; I've known D. O. since the 10th grade; maybe he wins.
52. WHAT DID YOU DO LAST NIGHT? WTF was last night? Monday? Oh shit; I remember. My girlfriend and I celebrated my not being sick anymore, woo, then I cleaned the downstairs bathroom, vacuumed the whole house, cleaned the upstairs bathtub, and washed all the dishes. Yes; I was very happy with her. I stayed sober, and went to bed before 2 so that I could get up and go see the dentist this morning--isn't that where all this shit started?